photo by Kelsey Farnham Photography for Verb Beauty Studio

 Fair Warning: this post is a complete stream of consciousness, a throwback to the old days if you will. Consider yourself warned! 

I know it’s been, uh, forever since I’ve managed to blog when I get messages from my friends like, “where are you? are you ok? your lack of an online presence concerns me!” or mentions in a conversation, “I wish you were still blogging, I have questions about such and such”. I really didn’t mean to shut this baby down but I have to confess a little something: 
I kinda, sorta lost my passion for blogging.
I’m not sure if it’s pregnancy hormones (Megan reminded me that I did the same thing right after I had Gray- so the nutso hormones are probably to blame), the other things going on in our life (we have something in the works that I can’t wait to tell you about), or the subtle changes that have been happening in the blogging world, but I just checked out of social media….and, gasp!, didn’t miss it for a hot second. I never once felt guilty about not writing or inspired to pull out my real camera, two things that have, for the last almost four years, brought me a lot of joy. 
It all just seemed to have lost the sparkle. 
So, here’s the thing: I know that blogging and writing will always be apart of my life, but I think I need to make some changes, set some new goals and discuss some things to get my head back in the right space. When I first started writing, my honest purpose was to document our move to Maine – I had no idea that my words would be published on international outlets, I would meet some of my best friends, get to travel with them, be asked to speak about blogging, work with amazing makers and small shop owners and have the opportunity to share my (sometimes less than popular) thoughts with this community. I also never dreamed (or even knew) that I could be compensated to do what I love. I understand wholeheartedly while some are turned off by the thought of paid content on blogs or social media but for me, as long as the post or product is something that I genuinely support, use, want to experience and I am able to give my honest opinions, it makes sense. I’m not sure that many know how much work goes into sponsored content – in fact, writing a paid post for me takes easily double the amount of time that a classic post because I want to ensure that both my readers and the sponsor are happy. It’s not an easy balance but I take pride in my work. I love spilling the beans on something that I think you guys might love and it also revs my engine when a brand loves my work and feels their investment in me was a worthy one. I hope that you all understand that when I publish sponsored content, it is not without thinking about each of you. I genuinely can’t wait to recommend products for Baby Girl, in the hopes that I am wiser and more prepared the second time around and will only stockpile things that will really simplify our lives with two babes.  If that’s not your gig, I totally get it, but that’s the type of content, sponsored or not, that I’m currently searching for on Pinterest so I know another mama is thinking, “yeeeeeees, please write that so I don’t have to Google it”. Also, I know it’s hard to read tone on a blog but this is all said lightheartedly and in an upbeat frame of mind, so imagine your mom friend sitting next to you, covered in spit up, holding a cold coffee and saying that last quote!
I also want and need to stop comparing myself to other bloggers. I’ve made a point to clear some head space in that way by leaving a handful of blogger groups that seemed, in my experience, to only focus on who works with whom, what each others page views are and how long it took the more seasoned bloggers to become “successful”. If you are a new blogger, my absolute best piece of advice is to always remember that there really is no way to determine who is a true “success” in the blogging world. We all have different goals – a fashion blogger and an interior design blogger are not reaching for the same benchmarks – and that is a wonderful thing. It’s what makes our world go ’round! Instead of focusing on comparing, I want to use that energy for something else. If that means not posting on Instagram for a week at time then oops! Just hang in there with me and know I’m alive, I’m just hopefully reading a book or hanging with my toddler or sneaking a nap (preggo problems).
So, without further ado and for anyone who is still reading, here are my current goals for blogging: I want to continue to share about my experiences in my voice while maintaining my son’s (and soon to be daughter’s) privacy, my sense of humor and perspective about what it is that makes me happy about this space. I want to take pretty pictures and sometimes say less than pretty words about motherhood, trying on jeans and the adventures that are about to present themselves in our lives. I don’t want to shy away from topics because I think people might not like them – whether they be serious or frivolous. I also think I should make it a goal not to do another stream of consciousness post for quite a while because, Lordy, this one was tedious.
And with that out of the way, some baby news: this week is my 20 week appointment and we get to see our sweet girl again! Prepare for baby spam, maybe a pregnancy update and an Instagram story or two from the stirrups (jokes, jokes)! 
Hang in there with me kids, I’ll get my groove back again, promise.