33 Thoughts I Have When I'm In My Mom Car

33 Thoughts I Have When I'm In My Mom Car

1. WHAT is that smell.

2. I have got to remember to crack the windows at night so this thing can air out.

3. When will this kid learn to buckle himself in?

4. I should really start carrying full sized trash bags in this car. 

5. Why are all of my cup holders ALWAYS full.

6. I should get more cup holders.

7. Can you buy cup holders for cars? I wonder if stroller cup holders will clip on somewhere.

8. No, we cannot listen to Disney Radio. 

9. I can never find a pen when I need one.

10. Wonder if the bank will accept a check written in crayon...

11.  I should probably throw away yesterday's Chick-Fil-A trash before we drive through again today.

12. Maybe that smell is a chicken nugget lost under the seats somewhere.

13. Why is my steering wheel sticky?

14. Every place on Earth should have a drive-through. I will drive across town to the dry cleaner with a drive through and not think twice about it. If I opened a business, it would definitely have a drive through.

15. God, that counting app is annoying.

16. I wonder when the baby will actually wear headphones...

17. Listen to him counting! He's sooooo smart!

18. The Chick-Fil-A drive through girl just called me by name. At least she knows to double down on the Polynesian sauce. 

19. I will throw that iPad out the window if he doesn't start playing another damn app.

20. I wonder if I can get away with driving all the way home before he starts screaming for chicken nuggets.

21. *bites chicken nuggets into 100 pieces and hands them back*

22. Wait, does he have stickers?

23. No. No stickers on my windows.

24. Do we own Goo Gone?

25. Oh hey, Dad in the minivan, I see you rocking that kid wagon and I'm jealous of your DVD player. 

26. So many red lights, so few minutes until nap time.

27. I think my next car needs WIFI so we can stream anything other than THE COUNTING APP.

28. I wonder if this chicken nugget covered salad is really healthy. Like, could I just order a #1 combo instead?

29. Oh, no sir, don't you even think about falling asleep in this car!

30. *singing at the top of my lungs to prevent a car nap*

31. Almost home, almost home, almost home.

32. Please transfer, please transfer, please transfer. 

33. Ok, but seriously, what is that smell?