Let’s talk shorts. 

Shorts are dreaded in many circles, and the Mom Body circle is no stranger to a strong hatred of shorts. They can roll between our ample thighs, wedge between our apple bottom cheeks and show the hailstorm that is cellulite. 
I won’t lie, it’s been years since I’ve bothered to even wander the shorts aisle of Target (thank you, Maine!) but now that we’re back in the south and I have a wild animal to chase after, it was time to bite the bullet.
I’ve rounded up a high end/low end mash up of printed shorts and rompers along with my oh so insightful tips on how to rock them no matter what size your pear shaped self is rocking. 
It should be fairly obvious that the pro photos are by Christa and the amateur shots are by my mom outside the basement of our rented beach house. 
Printed Shorts, High End
 top wearing a L | shorts wearing a 10 | clutch | shoes | necklace | earrings |

My number one tip to wearing shorts (and rompers) is to spray tan the living day lights out of your legs. Tan fat looks better than white fat, and that’s a fact. I typically ask my tanner to really hit the inner parts of my thighs with a heavy second (or third) coat and sometimes she thinks I’m joking but I clear that right up.

My second fave tip is this: if you feel exposed showing all of that leg, pair your shorts with a top that has sleeves (or layer a denim jacket over a short sleeve or sleeveless top). It’s a simple trick of the mind but something about having my arms covered makes me feel like I’m only showing off my stems and not my entire mom bod. 

Life changing tip numero tres: When searching for a pair of printed shorts, I highly recommend a pair with a side zip. Sometimes a button or zip fly can draw attention to our lower stomach/upper you know what, but a side zip can streamline the area. Also, pay no attention to the size number in the tag. If you need to size up for a comfortable and flattering fit, then by all means, size up! If it bothers you, cut the tag out when you get home.
I love the printed pair above for the fit (I’m wearing a 10) and the side zip, but also the dark pattern. The shorts have little stretch, which I think is a blessing because no one needs to see a pattern stretched and misshaped across a larger lump or bump.  
Printed Shorts, Low End
I honestly can’t say enough great things about the Save printed pair below – 
 
 | shorts wearing a 10 | top wearing a L | shoes | bangles |
Not only are they on sale for $14 but they feature a side zip AND a gathered elastic back. The elastic gather in the back is so, so forgiving for a little junk in the trunk and makes them so damn comfortable. 
Romper, High End
Please note that I refrained from photoshopping my arms. I am proud of resisting, or that’s what I’m telling myself. Anyway, the secret to wearing a romper, and Tip #4 is this:
| romper  | beaded necklace | bar necklace | earrings | booties 
Buy one made of quality, heavy fabric.
Why?
It’s a whole hell of a lot harder for heavy fabric to roll up in between your thighs while they rub together on a casual stroll. The heavier fabric also hides lumps and bumps which is key in a piece that has to cover your entire body.  I know it’s so tempting to order a romper at a crazy cheap price point because you aren’t sure how many times you’ll also have the nerve to wear it, but trust me on this. You need this one article of clothing to be flattering on your boobs, tummy and butt so quality is going to really carry you.
Tip 5 for wearing shorts and rompers: wear a nude shoe. 
Whether it’s a pump, strappy sandal or wedge, make it nude. A shade similar to your skin color will visually elongate the leg, making it look slimmer and more model-esque. And model-esque is my jam. And just FYI: heels are your friends. My Tom’s wedges are stupidly comfortable (and under $100) and can go anywhere, even the playground.
 | shorts | top | shoes | bangles |
This Anthro romper has a great detail that covers your stomach without adding bulk – I sent Meg one of these snaps and she snagged it, knowing how hard a great romper is to find. The solid black, crepe style fabric means you can dress this one up or down, making it worth the investment.

Side Tip: when it comes to rompers, remember that you’re wearing one piece and if you have to go to the bathroom (while wrangling a toddler, because that’s how we do), you’ll have to get down to your skivvy’s to do so.


Romper, Low End

I won’t lie, I searched long and hard to find a low end romper that I wanted to recommend to y’all (and slap on my own body), but I found one and I think you’ll like her.

| romper | shoes |

This little lady is for sale now, but reminds me more of a Fall piece. I love the army green shade and the three quarter sleeves. The fabric is obviously not as thick and luxe as the Anthro romper but it is a good option for those who want to try a romper while covering their arms and stashing pacis in their pockets!

Ultimately, I think all of us should have the confidence to rock all of the things but following a few key tips will make you feel like you’re killing it when you do!